HOME EC

HOME EC: I attended Parkview Junior Highschool from fifth through eighth grade. In order to graduate eighth grade one had to know the eight parts of speech; um,,noun, verb, adverb, pronoun, preposition, quark, matter, antimatter. No? Sixth grade was Mrs. Smith. She had an old phonograph from 1880's and she had an old Vaudeville bit about two Swedes talking to each other on the phone. They could not understand each other. I remember one comment, “Not the devil, the wind, the wind, what goes shwoosh!” There was also a song about Barney Google with the goo goo googly eyes. His name was Barney Oldfield one of the first to race Ford racecars. Dad knew the song and would sing Barney Google. In the seventh grade, I took Home Economics. The only thing we ever cooked was milk toast, which is disgusting, only a toothless invalid would find any value in such a treat. What a waste, we would havse been baking cookies or something delicious. The whole class was L shaped; the sewing machines on one side and ovens on the other. We had two projects for sewing. The first was hemming a tea towel. We were shown how to pull a thread and make a clear path for tearing or cutting. My fabric was so rotton that is tore crooked, but I adjusted. The final project was to sew a simple dress. I had blue fabric. I don't remember but Mom probably washed it and had me help stretch it into shape. Then I cut out the fabric and put it together. The plann was to have a fashion show at the end of the year. I took it home. Mom looked it over and promptly tore it apart and sewed more neatly than I had. I do not remember if I ever wore it again. More than likely, I did. That building was torn down in the eighties and replaced with a nice post office. I have a brick somewhere saved from the demolition. Fourth grade was at Wardwell School. The third floor was condemned. Lunch room was in the basement. The building was purchased by the Catholic Church. Parking was saved for the church. A bank and the city Library were built on the rest of the lot. I always wanted to slide down one of the fire slides but no such luck.

RIGGINS

RIGGINS, IDAHO Salmon river, the River of No Return. When I was a sophomore, Dad worked in Riggins, Lots of weekend commuting. He decided fairly early that we should all move to Riggins. So they parked the trailer in a pasture of the Horn family. We stayed in a nice cabin near a good sized creek. There was no TV reception or radio. We played in the creek, there were apparently otters but I never saw them. We were sent to Bible school, a bus picked us up and were home by early afternoon. One of the teachers thought I was the mother of the girls. I didn't know whether to be insulted or laugh. There was the obligatory pasting of macaroni on paper for The the girls. I do not remember much else. Dad decided that me, Richard and Phillip would be enrolled in school. I was delighted to find there was aan art class. The classes were each two hours long and rotated through the week so that the afternoon was free for assemblies or sports. I saw a beautiful young man who smiled at me and my heart was instantly lost. I actually felt a pang of some sort. His girl was blond and they were the power couple. Art class was fabulous. I used oil paints and I loved the smell of both oil pain as well as turpentine. I do not remember painting anything worthwhile. One project was plaster of paris. I used a half gall milk carton for the mold and carved a native face looking upward. The art teacher was impressed and displayed it in a case. My friend lived in Lucille which is just over the time line where it was Pacific time not Mountain. So folks were used to adjusting the drive here and there. One time we rode horses and it was so much fun, even took off our shirts, the things to see us were birds. Dad picked me up for lunch one time. We met one of his supervisors and a flunky named Herb. I had a burger. Did had something other than the special. The big boss ordered heart and so did Herb the flunky. I loved that experience so much. We all learned to play a card game called Nertz. It is a kind of reverse solitaire. The goal was to put all the cards into the discard pile and yell Nertz. It went very quickly.

ENOUGH ROOM

ENOUGH ROOM: This all started with husband commenting that he wished the house was twice as big so he could save more cardboard boxes. (Heaven forefend!) I am reminded of my first roommate, Sue. We rented a three bedroom, two bath house in Novato for about one hundred dollars a month. Remember this was the mid sixties. We both made about 35 dollars per week take home. We were both slobs, I was only a slob in the kitchen, I kept everything picked up and clean. Sue lived in a separate large bedroom with ensuite in the back. I went in there once and she had all of her clothes in piles all over the floor. They were clean, simply not hung up or folded and put away. We then moved into one bed apartments in the same complex. Rent was about 65 dollars per month. One time when Sue's gentleman friend came over, she hid her dirty dishes in the cupboards rather than wash them. When she married, I visite their one bedroom apartment in Napa. She had stuff strewn all over. I started picking up and storing etc. When her husband came home, he asked what happened. I shrugged said, Hurriance Susie I was invited to their home when they moved. Nice large two story home in Napa. Dinner was very nice. I started to help after and was going to stack the plates. Sue said, don't stack them, I don't wash the bottoms. I guess she really needed enough room for the meticulous housekeeper to kick into gear.

MOVIE TAGLINES

Time for Movie taglines: I will list some movies and you must guess them. AS you wish Leave the gun, take the cannoli My greates fear was the thought of a bullet right between my eyes. Christopher Columbus What happened to your hair? Snakes! Why is it always snakes? Play the song, Sam. I have a bad feeling about this. It's over, go home! We're gonnna need a bigger boat. I will never be hungry again. Houston, we have a problem. Come to the coast, we'll have a blast. Kevin! Yo, Adrian. Here's Johnny! Who you gonna call? You are trying to seduce me. Do you feel lucky punk? It's a trick question. You talkin to me? I'm walkin here! ​If he is crazy, what does that make you? Get away from her, Bitch! Answers: Princess Bride Godfather Patton Little Women Indiana Jones and the Lost Ark Casablanca Star Wars Ferris Beuller's Day Off The Fly Jaws Gone With The Wind Working Girl Home Alone Rocky Ghost Busters Mrs. Robinson Dirty Harry My Cousin Vinny Midnight Cowboy Taxi Driver One Flew Over the cuckoo's nest Alien

MODERN CONVENIENCES AND SOME EPITHETS

MODERN CONVENIENCES AND A FEW EPITHETS We all love our modcons and I am remembering a few from my history. The winter of 1947 was brutally cold. Dad was working in Gooding. They lived in a small house heated with a wood stove. Mom told me that one of my first ever bath was in a container of warm water sitting on top of the wood stove. Yum, steamed baby. I became acquainted with freeze dry clothes the winter we lived in the Bishop house, also heated by a wood stove. My job was to bring in the laundry, usually diapers. I would bring them in and stack them near the stove where they thawed perfectly. I then folded the diapers for use. The first ever washing machine I ever saw was at Grandma Horn's. There were three containers, the first was a tub with an agitator, the next was a tub for rinse water, a wringer and a tub where the wrung out clothing fell. The water had to be heated elsewhere. Grandpa Horn would go light the water heater which was located in the storm cellar. Then hot water was available through the taps in the house. I was fascinated by the wringer. All drying was confined to a line where it was hung to dry. Mom's most efficient line was where several lines were strung around a line that held at least fifty pieces of clothing. This was located at their Boise Cascade home near Mill Road in Emmett. Another device that is very oldfashioned was a good grinder. It was metal with several sized blades to use for which ever size of grind was wanted. The most common use was for grinding whole cranberries and one whole orange for the long time family favorite; cranberry, orange, black cherry jelly, celery, walnut. This makes a terrific turkey sandwich for left overs. The other use was for meat. I came home from school one day and a large gray thing was on a plate. I asked what it was and Mom told me it was tongue. Ugh. She boiled it, peeles it, ground it up with onions, dill pickles and mixed with Mayo. It made a very tasty sandwich spread. I am getting kind of hungry. The other kids at it up as.” they had never seen the original. Mom would save up chicken parts, back, wings etc for chicken noodle soup. She would make noodle by putting a pile of flour on a board and mixing in some eggs. This was then kneaded, rolled flat and cut into noodles. The noodles were then dried on newspaper in one of the bedrooms. For years, I thought that was where noodles came from. They were delicious! Epithets: My great grandfather was named Issac Newton Horn. When ever Mom visited Missouri as a youngster she would read the newspaper to him as he was illiterate. One time at dinner, he exclaimed, “Give me some of that there lickum dabby.” Another Missouri relative was displeased with the state of her daughter's underwear. “Julia, I do believe you have a buzzsaw in your ass!” Lastly, there was a local dance being held. It was well attended. One of the dancers was a large, tall, redheaded woman who was a vigorous dancer. She slipped and fell on the dance floor. One local wit shouted. “ There is a big red down in the herd!”

2022 Christmas Letter

2022 Christmas Letter: Seasons Greetings Beloved Family and Precious Friends. I have reviewed my book for this year. I had lots of odd dreams all about various aspects of self. I have chatted a few times with Aunt Wanda. She recently had Covid and only had symptoms of a sinus headache. Thank goodness for vaccines. I asked her if she knew the entire story about when Dad ran away from home. Yes, she did. He ran away when ge was 13, rod his bike to Ontario, sold it for enough money to buy a ticket to Minnesotta. When he got there, Grandpa Rose called Charlie Berglund to let him know that Ralph had gotten there. Charlie asked him send him home on the train. Dad stayed for the harvest. Grandpa Rose took him to the train. Dad changed the ticket to New Orleans. He stayed there for a few days. He got picket up for vagrancy. The judge decided to keep him for a few days. He took Dad to the station and bought him a ticket to Idaho. As soon as he left, Dad cashed in the ticket and stowed on board a freighter. The ship went through the Panama Canal. I am sure he was putl to work. I am not sure where he deboarded the ship, I think San Diego. At any rate he got home okay and had quite an adventure to tell. Numbers: I did not learn mu numbers at home. So I had to cheat in first grade. I remember asking a class mate how to make an eight. Yeah, it wentn downhill from there. Brother Phillip got interested in Ancestry.com. He looked into Nellie Rose Berglund. She had people from Canada. How about that? When the Berglunds lived in Boise, Aunt Wanda told me that Dad sold newspapers downtown and told people he was an orphan and really needed the money. Jeez! In May, I did a stupid. I packed at Davita, locked the car and started to walk. The car started rolling backward because it was not in park. Instead of waiting for it to stop rolling, I decided that I must chase the car. I got the door unlocked but slipped and fell, banging my forehead on the pavement and breaking my glasses. A lady asked me if I needed help, yes, I can't get up. They called the EMT folk who decided I needed an MRI. As a result, they found a subdural bleed and I was transferred to OHSU. Whee! Met some cool people. Tim rescued me the next day. I no longer chase cars. I was hoping that the subdural bleed had knocked out the petit mal. But no, I managed to lose my gray sweat pants, underwear, cami and sweater. They were in the laundry basket. I simply forgot that I put them there. Sigh... A week or so after that I got my very first ticket. City Cop pulled me over, I was going 36 mph in a school zone. The ticket was for $165. Had to write a paper check. Traffic school was not available. Won't be slacking off like that again. Merry, merry everyone, I love you! Royce

SHAVING

“ SSHAVING Two years ago, this past September, my sister, Gale and her MIL, Joanne came to visit. They brought the Golden pup who was a big hit in the neighborhood.! One day we were having lunch at Shark Bites nd the halibut fish and chips with malt vinegar was delicious. At one point, Joanne asked why I did not have more facial wrinkles. I looked at her and said, “I shave faithfully every day.” Gale nodded in agreement. It all started when I was 35, it was at my Grandmother Horn's funeral. She ws 93 and had died of ascending cholangitis after having her gallbladder removed. Side note, I worked at St. Al's in medical records. Her autopsy report came across my desk. This was way before HIPPA and confidentiality did not preclude reading family records. At any rate the autopsy showed her great vessels as clean as a whistle. I hope that I inheirit her constutition. Back to the funeral, my sister Ellen pointed at me and said, “Ok, look, Roucie is growing a mustache.” That was the end of the mustache. I did ask my doc for a test to rule out hirsutism by tumor on the pituitary. Yay, negative. So, I now have smooth facial features, but all other loose wrinkly, hair skin is other wise out of view.